So I claim them as mine. Good day,have been in a relationship for 6years with my girlfriend,we have been both happy and have even taken her to see my parents which she didnt complain about, this is the lady I really want to marry, suddenly ,I called to know how she was but she wasnt picking my calls and even ignore my messages I do sent to her,I was worried so I decided to meet her up to ask the reason she wasnt picking and not responding to my messages, all she said was she was busy and that I should give her space.i was so confused because we never had quarry at all,I do call her all d time and also we do see almost all d time,I dont know what to do since she said I should give her space.there are so many thing running in my mind rite now.pls what should I do. Shes very successful in her career and travels the world. Not Sexually Pleasing They may not want to sexually please you or give you anything more than what they like to receive. Sorry for the long message. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/. I ended up deciding to give her space, but I made the mistake of going to her place a few days later, and we became frustrated with one another as she wouldnt tell me what the other things are that were bothering her in her life. We havent had sex yet because shes making me wait because shes been used sexually before so shes cautious. We girls love our girl time. I think it could be very beneficial. This takes work and I do believe you can do it but you have to be very strategic about how you go about this. I really want to talk but have not been I have sent a texted the other day cause I was invited last week over for dinner and didnt know if she still wanted me over. This is vital to every relationship because communication is key. Next time you speak to her I would strongly suggest for you to say something like I enjoy being with you and spending time with you, but with another man in the picture is not respectful to me and I wont allow myself to continue this if you are dating the both of us. Hope this helps! Hello David, Catch up on sports, PlayStation and whatever else you want to do. Great advice thanks for all your replies. In the second year, i was too busy with myself and now i know that in that second year i was less care to her, i didnt treat her right or more careless. Theyre not participating in discussions and asking you questions. I realized that i was so selfish. Your happiness is YOUR responsibility. She got very irritated and basically said FYI Im going there to help my mom food shop and when did you ever tell sit and have a talk with me and say you wanted to get together officially? I dont wanna push her so Im giving space and waiting for her answer. She told me she need space and I told her its ok, take her time to think about it and come back to me when shes comfortable with her decision. On my end I will not be doing anything unloyal and I just need time to myself for a little while. I am still her bio on instagram and she still has the same posts Of me up. She said it had developed gradually. Truth be told i am in denial of not being in a relationship. For some reason I feel insecure some times questioning it because she has days she is more matter of fact or distant. Hello Salvatore, she said she loves me so much and cares about me so much and constantly apologizes for putting me through all of this, and im just torn. Any thoughts? I just wanted to bring across my situation to you, hope you can get something back to me or at least make a video about it because I cant seem to find any videos exclusive to my situation. Thank you for taking the time to read When She Says She Needs Space. A week before our anniversary she said she neeeded some space to work out who she is as a person and what she wants to be in her life. We texted for a few hours and had the break go into effect at midnight. So Ive been in a relationship almost a year and my girlfriend recently decided she wanted space because we have started arguing lately. Or she probably has to manage her issues. Hope this helps. In order for us to really be able to give you solid advice, I would recommend speaking to one of our amazing coaches about this and seeing what they say. She will see it as your energy and actions will be different. Hello Apollonia , I was getting so frustrated that I couldnt get straight answers. I have these negative thoughts about her not wanting to be with me anymore, or there being someone else in the picture but I know neither of these are true remembering the great times weve had and the emotions weve shared; also Im almost positive there isnt someone else in the picture, because she MADE time for me, shes very busy and driven and she decided that I could be in her life. Ive been with my girl for 1 year and 2 months and weve had a tough run together. That really upset me and I said to her that wasnt right and she deserved better. I didnt say anything or hit her up at all because Im pretty sure its a test. Went out with friends, had fun and showed I am capable of living alone just as you advised here. I am wondering what to do? what should i do if theres another guy having interest with my girl? I am scared im going to lose her for good. once she explained to me i stood there even though she told to leave a couple of times and just talked because i just wanted to show that i care about whats going on she told me she didnt want to be touched but yet i still nagged her for a couple times for a hug. But they also told me to tell her how i felt if she didnt want to talk. 1. It is not her job to make you feel better about yourself. I dated a girl I met online for about 2 and a half months. Just last week she seemed different and asked she needs time and space to think. Theres nothing you can do here but sit back. I am very much hurt and dont know how will i get over it. I am not 100% sure that this guy is just a friend. This is a powerful part of your relationship. I check her WhatsApp status to see when she was on last. Ive had a tough time understanding her thought process. It really feels uncomfortable the moment she said she needed space but I really really want to help her get over it. Am I doing the right thing? I honestly do not want to let this woman slip through my fingers a second time. Give her space and dont put pressure on her. We talked for awhile and she said text me later tonight. She has been struggling with alcohol and she thinks with this break she can focus on her and being a better person for us. If she asks for a few days or weeks of alone time, give it to her. She might be needing some time away from you. Apollonia. Hope to speak with you soon. What happens if she doesnt contact you and you still have strong feelings for her? Right now is the best time for you to reflect on yourself. As scary as that sounds you have to understand this will make the relationship shine and develop new boundaries or show its true colors. I was concerned she did not inform her doctor about this. I was ok with it. You can go here to connect with a coach https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/ In this three months though, weve really connected and have gone on countless dates and two short weekend trips together. As I said it was weird because she was so in to me and vice versa so it was out of the blue.. thanks, Hello Iwan, My girlfriend and I dated during our separation from our spouses for 2 years. She says she needs time and space to sort out her feelings for me and im scared that im going to lose her and my kids. Im 53, married. We broke up for several reasons, but mainly because I didnt pay as much attention to her as i should have. To add to her stresses her mum has just had to have an eye operation which we hope isnt cancerous. Which caused our communications issues but there was no fighting, rarely any disagreements. She also asked me if I would be friends were her so I can see the dog because recently we just got a dog. Youre giving her space because you can remember how badly youve needed that once for yourself and, seeing where thats gotten you now, you know firsthand that space and time can work wonders. If the both you have taken time apart because you were too clingy or needy then I believe its best if you let her reach out only. I had a friend meet at her house and took everything back. Apollonia. And I am just screwing things up with my own life and the relation. I know this is a bit complicated. Keep balance. I am not sure what to do. Thanks for your reply! Ive always been the nice guy , I acted weak, on situations in which I should have been strong, and it seems she have lost her attraction to me. The worst part is that from that relationship she now suffers from ptsd and depression. Please book a session here. My girlfriend told me she wants space and I dont know how to react to it or even what to expect and will she ever talk to me again?? I hope you can book a coaching session with me so we can dive further into this. After a day we tried to make things work, to make the relationship work. However, she has been texting to me every evening after work to share some news and to see how i am She would be my fiance soon and had planned our future together. Her Ex. Should I contact her. cuz she took stand for me in evry worst situation and now i know i made mistake after seeing ur videos and articles will she ever initiate call or text or it jus over from her side??? So I gave it to her, willingly and happily as this gave me the opportunity to take a breather myself. Just not a nice place, food, not much interaction with the families etc. Sure, there might be a part of her that is secretly hoping that youll pursue her more, but dont bank on this. Even if she says its not that. I was devastated. In our daily routine we used to video call chat over text and call each other 3-4 times a day. Try reaching out now since some time has passed. Ive been praying and working on me thats all I can do. In order to figure out the sweet spot between constantly texting her and completely leaving her alone, I would recommend speaking to one of our coaches who are better equipped to give you solid advice. I finally agreed to give her a break last week. She will be busy since she has to stay there for at least 1 whole year and Im not sure if I can be strong to wait for her response from then. Focus on your life and continuing to fulfill yourself and make yourself happy. Some people lose their individuality when in a relationship, and once they realize this, they feel like they need some space for themselves. I just need help!, During this time I have found a job without her knowing to show im being proactive, but I feel like her seeing I couldnt get a job was a factor turning her off as well. Thank you. Ive found the content really insightful and Ive started to implement some of it. When a woman asks for space, I promise you that it doesnt automatically mean that shes cheating, even though that was your experience. We have an incredible amount of valuable content on our youtube channel at no cost. You need time with friends and hobbies, those are important in relationships. ive been sitting back and taking it easy and letting her come to me, and she does. She loved this idea. She and I were super flirty and we would meet up and text and flirt non stop Appreciated. She never once said, we need to talk. Now she has poisoned my ex against me and suddenly shes the most wonderful woman in the world (which I already knew) but she was dealing with her own traumas and issues and basically freaked out through insecurity and fear. Can you give me the short answer of why she asked for space? I left her house because i felt like she didnt want me their anymore. Hello maam. Continue to give her space and not tolerate her having both of you. Prior to this everything seemed to be going fine and normal as usual. During this time of us being out of our elements, she has become not herself Not showing much affection towards me, seeming off in all texts she sends not to me, but also not posting on Instagram (she did daily before this), things of that nature (this lead me to start thinking that something is off with her and I am just adding on to the stress she currently has). Here are the links with more information. Meaning working on being more positive and happier. I didnt message her back at all from that message. ? All of these questions are negative self-talk in your head, and its not going to do you any good. So, the best thing you can do is focus on you and do things that make you happy, surround yourself around people that make you happy and wait for her to reach out. Anyway, we saw each other last Friday and had a couple of drinks. Is there hope? I would recommend giving her the space. We met up for a casual drink and found out how much we had in common and how like minded we are. I want to take her out, we havent been out for years alone together, but it never seems to work out, either not enough money or no babysitter. My ex is an intelligent woman (lawyer) and knew about my past mistakes, she has requested space but spoken to my mother stating she really cares about me but her head is all over the place. She has just recently gotten out of an 8 month relationship. We have been dating for a couple months now and although we do argue I thought everything was okay. I would highly suggest two things. She said we needed to give each other space to move on. But I dont want to lose her neither. I just hope I am not being kept on the side as a stable security while she looks to see if there might be another. Best, Shes moving into her new place this wknd. Hardly ever go out. Tuesday night I tried calling her just to clarify things but she did not answer but replied that she wants a more days to think things over. Hang out with your friends because at this point you probably havent been hanging out with your friends as much. Its up to her to be able to walk through her fears and anxieties and go to you and talk to you about them and be open again. Thank you in advance for your reply. I asked if she was talking to someone and she said she was. Is she going to contact me or not?. You want to show less attachment as you were too pushy previously. We seemed to agree on everything, a match made in heaven. She said she would like that. Im sorry that you are going through this as I know its incredibly difficult. But Im confused. depression meds . Spending time together will not make a person always fall more especially if its not reciprocated. -Apollonia. how treat her when she call me every day in night for 5 minute ? This is a transformational 3-month experience with Apollonia to transition your dating and relationship life. Hello a girl Ive been seeing for about a month has recently requested space. We did! Things took off and the connection was amazing from the first minute we started chatting. later on i kept trying to contact her but last week she blocked me on all socialmedias is this like she thought i keep disturbing her or she wanted to moveon? Im not sure, I really do see lots of things that I messed up on doing in these past 2-3 weeks when she became distant, and all I want to do right now is call her and say that Im working on all of them. Are you involved in everything to the point where she knows you will always pick her up and do all the work to put her back together when she falls? Its been a week now since that text and shes been posting things on her Instagram story , which shes never done the past 5 months so it really feels like shes been posting them for me to see that shes fine (i.e. Now on to no contact for me. Wishing you the best! How long should the space be ? Best of luck with everything. She wanted to talk in person and wanted to come to an understanding, but I have not heard from her since Saturday and its now Monday. Ugh. She feels uncertain about the relationship, she said that she felt something growing as we spent more time together, but after I changed she started to feel nothing, as shes feeling now, is there still hope to rekindle the relationship? Best, At some point of time, she would feel rather conflicted with her thoughts and apologise me for hurting me and making me insecure. Apollonia, hi apollonia! We started out as friends with benefits, but she ended up developing feelings for me and then I did shortly after. Me being the good boyfriend I am after she went to sleep I wrote her 4 paragraphs explaining how much she meant to me and how special she was just to make her feel better when she woke up. I want to properly guide you through this so I hope you will be able to check out my coaching page and book a time. What should I do? Please reach out to me if you want more guidance I am here to help! Since when she met this group she has been asking for space from me. Other women is not a problem, I could have somebody here with me in a heartbeat but what this woman has done for me and the love she has shown me I have never felt or received. Instead, i gave in to her request. Hello Apollonia. Posts: 1 Apollonia. Apollonia Ponti, an international certified coach and founder of apolloniaponti.com. Im not worried or jealous thinking she would be with another. She forgot it was valentines today too but is committed to her studies and shes encouraged me to go out with friends instead, which I am and would have done anyway as I respect she has studies. A few weeks pass by after that https://www.apolloniaponti.com/blog/ and https://www.youtube.com/c/ApolloniaPonti However, one day she was so bummed out. Now the past month, weve been seeing each other alot, and things were progressing even more. she says she just wants to find herself and be with the kids. During the conversation she told me that her last relationship was a nightmare. We love a strong man that can hold his own at the end of the day. She said i am her stress and i give her stress hence she thinks its not a healthy relationship. Thank you for the advice. However, about four years ago, she was in a very abusive relationship. She told me she loved me and wanted to be with me, but we just needed to take some space. She said that a couple weeks might do us both good or maybe after Spring break or something and that shell see how she feels then. Hello Apollonia, she was in year 1 while I was in my finals in the University, we got to meet before the Corona break and I took her number and we started getting close and finally started dating by September. Here is the link if you would like to take the next step. However, I did have one question on when/how to communicate. I have been with my girlfriend for just over 5 years now, 7 months ago we moved in to a house we built together but over the past few months she has become very hot and cold towards me, Some days she will feel totally in-love with me and other she will feel nothing (We have spoken about how she feels, that is how she describes it). Changes are not always a bad thing. Anyway, shes been wanting me to talk for ages about our future plans because she wants to move to a different city but Ive been reluctant to talk about it because I was too scared to take that plunge. ), then she went from spending a day or two back at her place to we need a break for a week or two. I agreed by saying its better we cut off a relationship.. Then today she sent a big text e plaining that she loves me and she knows i love her too.. She said she is not angry at she just need a space to solve her personal problems alone with her family She insisted that i must stay strong for her then we will take it from then.. Then just because i had no text to send back i called back to say i recieve a message She told ne that she is worried of the way how i am viewing things.she send another text that she will text to me later I am confused and not knowing whats going on with her Can i just leave her alone, call or text.. Have i lost her for good? Hey Richard, you might have put her on a pedestal too fast and you got attached without taking the time to really get to know her. Or with messages but no meet ups, or totally no contact? I would give her the space and keep reminding yourself that you are enough, youre doing the work and youre not the same person you were. My name is Apollonia Ponti. Friday that week i went to meet her she saw me and didnt smile even once earlier when she used to meet me she used to hug me tightly but now everything was different and it was hurting me a lot. I guess after all that, Im not 100% sure if we should be together, but I feel like Ive invested so much into this relationship and were both good people, that it breaks my heart to think we cant figure this out and get on with our future as a couple. Start really working on yourself and seeing where this is coming from because otherwise its going to keep coming up. What should I do? There has to be a balance between anything in the relationship but also if your partner says she does need space, you have to give her that space. In laymans terms, gaslighting is the psychological manipulation of someone to make them doubt their sanity, particularly by encouraging them to doubt their own experiences or perceptions of reality. It feels like she tries to hint or expects me to read her mind which is hard. Sorry to hear that youre going through this. So I didnt text or call her after that. Hey Jaden. I would encourage you to book a session so I can help give you tailored advice. Hello Jack, I would have to know more details about the relationship through a coaching session to give you exact advice. She has told me that I have been jealous (though I dont see how), clingy and becoming dependent on her. I sent her a dick pic 2 weeks ago (after she asked) and she saw it in the am and said wow good morning to you too. I would give her some time and space. Hello Ashayne, I then told her that if she needs anything let me know Im here for her is you want to talk about anything. I agree that there were silence moments between us because (from my point of view) she was under stress from moving from her own studio back to their parents (with not a pleasant home situation) and from the Examination Committee of her university due to fraud (which is resolved fortunataly with no negative consequences for her) . Hi Timothy. Would talk daily and really connected. I know! https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/. Is it still a friends with benefits? This girl seems like she is up and down and might not even fully love herself. I have respected her and not contacted her for a week so far. Focus on yourself again, let her come to you and go slow here. My girlfriend told me that she needs some personal space. and all the women that say if I dont tell u its not lying. So recently I started dating a girl who just came off an abusive relationship. Me and my gf met back at the end of Jan. We were fresh out of relationship of. So we can help you properly I would recommend booking a coaching session so we could get more information on the issue. Can I eventually reach out to her with a brief positive text encouraging her with her new job and also make any brief mention that I am working on me? All I know she is trying her hardest to avoid me right now. Something that directs away from the negative she was seeing and focuses on a positive. She said that she needed time to think about this, and these are my conclusions. Best, Hello David, Hey hows it going do my issue is the girl I been dating for 2 months we went through a small rough patch She asked for space last Wednesday and I gave it to her did the no contact rule I even reflected on my self on what I did wrong which was I was a little pushy and persistent with certain things. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching/, i kept trying to call and in trust i called her frm another numberand said my name she hung up! The conversation was brief but nice. I subscribed to your channel on YouTube months and have seen lots of your videos. Ive begged and apologized for doing nothing. Apollonia. She said she needed time to herself so she can focus on herself and Better herself. We did run into one another after 10 days of no contact. I still care about her though. If you are interested in a private coaching session here is the link where you can schedule it and I can give you tailored advice to your relationship. Do you want results now? I like the girl a lot, have been there for her and she has been there for me. A few days after she messages me and asks how I am and proceeds to tell me that she misses to which I replied i miss you too, but I decided to keep the conversation light. She took it negatively saying that I lied to her and seems like Im just testing the waters and yesterday she told me she needed a Space, but we can still message each other. We worked together in the same building. She has to see the value in the relationship with you first. Its just what is happening around the world for everyone. I didnt get a response. But I just want her as part of my life And it has been a long time. Im really depressed and paranoid at the same time. Hello i have been with my girlfriend 1year now and she is been hurting from her ex boyfriend after that shes been dating gorls until she knows me after that we been in a great relationship we talk everyday and always told she doesnt want me to breakup with her now after 1 year we did have a problem and asked for break i ask her to forget i talk with many friends i did go to see her even ahe didnt want to now she bloked me from all social media and follow two guys on Instagram that i bloked because they want her she is so cold with me and even dont care i think please help i feel really because iv been faithful to her and never ever did something bad to her pls help sos. I am sorry this is happening to you. WebWhen a girl says she needs space, she means it.
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